Anger is a perfectly reasonable response to getting dumped. Rejection is hard, and anger is our mind’s go-to response to cope.
The response is helpful if it initiates some change — some further clarification that might help both parties understand better. The response is not helpful if it lasts longer than it should. It should not initiate months, even years of resentment.
The solution is simple: practice not being resentful. In fact, practice exactly the opposite.
Matthieu Ricard, dubbed by scientists as “The World’s Happiest Person,” had this to say recently to Krista Tippett on her podcast:
“You cannot, in the same moment of thought, wish to do something good to someone or to harm that person. Those are mutually incompatible, like hot and cold water. So the more you will bring benevolence in your mind at every of those moments, there’s no space for hatred. It’s just very simple, but we don’t do that. We do exercise every morning, 20 minutes, to be fit. We don’t sit for 20 minutes to cultivate compassion. If we were to do so, our mind will change, our brain will change. What we are will change.”