When you don’t like your teammates

Or your coworkers. Or your family. Or any group of people you belong to, the problem may not be the group itself.

It may be a problem of perception.

Take this parable, The Two Travelers and the Farmer, as sage instruction in how perception alters reality:

“A traveler came upon an old farmer hoeing in his field beside the road. Eager to rest his feet, the wanderer hailed the countryman, who seemed happy enough to straighten his back and talk for a moment.

‘What sort of people live in the next town?’ asked the stranger.

‘What were the people like where you’ve come from?’ replied the farmer, answering the question with another question.

‘They were a bad lot. Troublemakers all, and lazy too. The most selfish people in the world, and not a one of them to be trusted. I’m happy to be leaving the scoundrels.’

‘Is that so?’ replied the old farmer. ‘Well, I’m afraid that you’ll find the same sort in the next town.’

Disappointed, the traveler trudged on his way, and the farmer returned to his work.

Some time later another stranger, coming from the same direction, hailed the farmer, and they stopped to talk. ‘What sort of people live in the next town?’ he asked.

‘What were the people like where you’ve come from?’ replied the farmer once again.

‘They were the best people in the world. Hard working, honest, and friendly. I’m sorry to be leaving them.’

‘Fear not,’ said the farmer. ‘You’ll find the same sort in the next town.'”

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